Auditions — Dog Sees God, Confessions of a Teenage Blockhead

Old Academy Players [3544 Indian Queen Lane, Philadelphia, PA 19129; 215-843-1109; https://oldacademyplayers.org/] is pleased to announce the audition date for its 2026 production of Dog Sees God, Confessions of a Teenage Blockhead by Bert V. Royal. Dog Sees God will be performed from January 9-25, 2026. The show is directed by Norman Burnosky.

Auditions:

Old Academy Players welcomes new talent! Please note: Old Academy Players is a non-profit community theater.  All roles are performed on a volunteer basis. If you are auditioning for a show, please complete our Audition Form [https://oldacademyplayers.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/OAP-Forms-for-web_Audition-Form.pdf] in advance of the audition.

Audition Date & Time:
Saturday, September 13th at 10:00AM.  Anyone auditioning must arrive at the theater no later than 11:30AM.

Old Academy Players is a 100% volunteer organization.  All roles are non-union, non-paying.

Location of Auditions:
Old Academy Players
3544 Indian Queen Lane
Philadelphia PA 19129

There is free parking onsite, located behind the theater.

Audition Requirements:

Please prepare a 1–2‑minute comedic monologue. You may be also asked to read from the script.

Performance Dates:

1/7(preview performance), 1/9, 1/10, 1/11, 1/16, 1/17, 1/18, 1/23, 1/24, 1/25.

*Additional performances may be added.

Rehearsal Dates:

Rehearsals will generally be held on Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays, with additional rehearsals scheduled as we approach Opening Night.

Cast members will be required to attend the Club Night Performance of It’s Only a Play, which will be held on Wednesday, November 5th.

If cast, you will also be required to assist with Set Build on 11/23 and 11/24 and set strike on Sunday, January 25th.

Cast members will be required to assist with Hospitality for one performance of It’s Only a Play.

*Additional rehearsals may be added as needed

Show Synopsis:  When CB’S dog dies from rabies, CB begins to question the existence of an afterlife.  His best friend is too burnt out to provide any coherent speculation; his sister has gone goth; his ex-girlfriend has recently been institutionalized; and his other friends are too inebriated to give him any sort of solace.  But a chance meeting with an artistic kid, the target of this group’s bullying, offers CB a piece of mind and sets in motion a friendship that will push teen angst to the very limits.  Drug use, suicide, eating disorders, teen violence, rebellion and sexual identity collide and careen toward an ending that’s both haunting and hopeful.

Characters:
*All roles are non-union, non-paying*

Roles:

We are looking for adult actors, over the age of eighteen, in their 20s and 30s to fill the following roles:

• CB (Charlie Brown) is the main character in the play. He is intensely saddened over the death of his dog, and is forced to question both his sexuality and his social status when he unwittingly falls for his classmate Beethoven.
• Beethoven (Schroeder) became the school outcast prior to events in the play. A bit of a recluse, Beethoven takes solace in playing the piano, but when he and CB become romantically involved, his world is turned upside down.
• CB’s Sister (Sally) has gone Goth, at least for a portion of the play. It is mentioned that, like her character basis, she changes her philosophy on life often.
• Van (Linus), always the philosopher in childhood, is now a pothead with a worldview to match.
• Matt (Pig-Pen) is a pathological germophobe whose dirtiness has been internalized – he is sex-obsessed, homophobic, and terrorizes Beethoven mercilessly. He is CB’s best friend.
• Tricia (Peppermint Patty), a party girl, who professes herself to be “pretty” and “popular”.
• Marcy (Marcie), a party girl and Tricia’s sidekick. She has a threesome with Tricia and Matt during the play.
• The role of Van’s Sister (Lucy) has been cast.

Contact: Norman Burnosky via email at [email protected] with any questions.

Established in 1923, the Old Academy Players is a diverse and inclusive non-profit volunteer theater organization with the mission “to provide extraordinary and enjoyable theater at an affordable price.” The players perform in the historic Old Academy Building, a 200-year-old building home to “OAP” since 1932. The theater is distinguished by its most notable alumna, Hollywood icon and East Falls native Grace Kelly whose old show programs are on display. Old Academy Players is a member of the Greater Philadelphia Cultural Alliance. Support is generously provided by the Philadelphia Cultural Fund and the Sylvia W. and Randle M. Kauders Foundation.

We are looking for adult actors, over the age of eighteen, in their 20s and 30s to fill the roles.

Anyone auditioning must arrive at the theater no later than 11:30AM.

Please prepare a 1–2‑minute comedic monologue. You may be also asked to read from the script.